Suzie: Welcome to Sharing My Truth with Mel and Suzie. The uncensored version where we bear it all.

Mel: We do.

Suzie: 1, 2, 3, 4. And hello, everyone, and welcome back to.

Mel: Shark what yout Thought.

Suzie: Getting very ASMR in this.

We're gonna whisper today.

I'm just kidding. We're not gonna whisper. That'd be so hard for us because we're yellers.

Don't find us in a crowd.

Hello, everyone, and welcome back. Thank you so much for tuning in to us today.

You're listening to Mel and Susie and you guys can find us at Share My Truth Pod on all of our socials. You guys can watch this hello. On YouTube and see us everywhere.

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anywhere else.

Mel: I think YouTubes.

Suzie: Yeah, I said that.

Mel: I think I said Instagram.

Suzie: Did you say that? Yeah. Okay.

And you can go to sharingmytruth.com If you would like to share your own truths with us, send us an email. Send us a voicemail. We'd love to hear from you.

Hey, babes.

Mel: Hello, darling.

Suzie: How are you?

Mel: Fabulous.

Suzie: Oh, my God. So good. We're feeling a little fresh, feeling a little fabulous. We haven't even had a glass of wine yet.

Mel: I know.

Suzie: Super impressed with us, to be honest.

Mel: It's very impressive.

Suzie: Yeah, no, it's feeling good. We're. We're bearing this cold weather together, which feels good because Mel and I. People don't realize this. Mel and I spend a lot of our days together and a lot of our time texting each other.

And, you know, I was away for a little while in Zibahamas and she was also away at her little house. I was all the way in, wherever the hell that is.

And.

And so, yeah, we. I'm just cherishing this time we have together. And I'm. She's leaving again this week and I'm leaving next week. One busy little girls.

Mel: I know.

Suzie: I'm trying to just keep busy in the winter so I don't have to think about the winter.

Mel: You know what I mean? Yeah, I do detest it. But, you know, we've talked about that. I have nausea. Yes.

Suzie: And hopefully you guys are also going on some vacays.

Mel: Everyone is going somewhere in February.

Suzie: Brutal.

It's brutal everywhere, right? Like, it's crazy.

Like, I've been in Toronto for over nine years now, so not. Not just. Not yet a decade, but close to it. And it's. I don't believe it's ever been disclosed this cold outside, I swear to God.

Because I'm from a little town called Alberta. Edmonton, Alberta.

Mel: And that's real cold.

Suzie: Freezing. This is almost that. I swear. Maybe I'm being dramatic. This feels like that it's freezing. I've never had to put my dog in so many sweaters. I will just say that.

Mel: Do you know, I feel I'm making you British because Brits talk about the weather all the time. They don't talk about the weather here. We start every conversation talking about the weather, which is ridiculous.

Suzie: But weather is the same in Ms. Jingli.

Mel: It's boring. It just rains. So it's like. But we talk about it incessantly. I think it's. We're willing it to be good.

Suzie: That's nice.

Mel: So I've made you British.

Suzie: I'm also willing it to be fresh and good.

Mel: Okay, well, good luck with that one. And.

Suzie: And bar mitzvah to you. And we're talking about today.

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: We're talking about a little thing called the length of sex.

Mel: And that's SXX for TikTok. You can't say sex.

Suzie: We're talking a little bit about a thing called the length of sex and how long sex should be.

Mel: Yes. Because somebody asked us this question and it's a. It's an excellent question.

Suzie: Of course it is.

Mel: And I also saw an article about it and people talk a lot about how much they should be having it and it's not enough. But they don't actually talk about what they should be doing.

Suzie: Like how long the sessions.

Mel: The sesh should be. Should be.

Suzie: Right. It's a great question. I'll let you go first. Mel, why don't you go first?

Mel: Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. I'd say. And according apparently to this article in Grazia magazine is. It's quite short for most people, I think. Look, I think.

Suzie: Which is the average time.

Mel: Yeah. So the average time, it was like seven. Thirteen, I think was what most?

Seventeen. Thirteen to seventeen to thirteen minutes. So the short answer to this, and as we know I'm not very good at short answers, is I think you should vary it.

Suzie: Great.

Mel: You should have some cookies in a cupboard if you like. Sorry. We did another episode. We were talking about stationary cupboards. So it's in my mind. And you should have one where it's more.

Suzie: When you have the time.

Mel: When you have the time, obviously, particularly if you have children. It's extremely tricky.

Suzie: I would assume so.

Mel: And I think. And children of all ages. People assume it's just young children. But it's still difficult.

Suzie: Cause kids, teenagers need **** all the time. I'm sure.

Mel: Always ask you questions.

And, you know,

you know, we've talked about this before. You have to have boundaries and make sure people knock on the door and all these kinds of people don't barge in, you know, but it is.

I think it makes particularly women really uncomfortable. Like,

oh, my God. And they're just like, okay, let's just get on with it. And so I think that is a big problem.

I think.

Yeah. So I think you should have different kind of lengths. But what's the ideal length? Well, I, I think it is different for everyone.

Suzie: Obviously, it depends.

Mel: Yeah, I think some people really like the.

The preamble. The bit towards. Yeah, the full blow. There you go. Good word. And also, particularly maybe a lot of women who find it quite difficult to orgasm, like a lot of preamble, and women who.

It's not so difficult, maybe need to just get to the thing.

Suzie: Yeah, well, so I, I follow the sex educator woman. I think her name is Seema something. She's great on Instagram.

Mel: And I know she Indian.

Suzie: She's Indian. She's really fabulous. And she talks a lot about Indian.

Mel: From India.

Suzie: India. From India. Yes.

And so I think one of her followers or whatever was saying after, after this shorter period of time, I'm actually finding sex really uncomfortable and that there's, like, friction. And she was like, that's actually really normal.

A lot of women only find that they can handle penetrative sex for, like, five minutes until there's, like, friction. And maybe you just need to lube up a little bit more.

That's my personal opinion, is that, like, people just need to use more lube in general because we. The ***** can't get all the wetness it needs, you know, from just itself.

Like, it needs a little bit of help.

Mel: Yeah. And I. It also depends on your age, of course, because obviously as you get older, there's issues of dryness and all that sort of stuff. I think the other thing is, it's interesting because I mentioned.

I've mentioned this before. I'm mentioning it again because it's going around social media is a clip of Amy Schumer on Call Somebody's Daddy, whatever that place is.

Suzie: Oh, yeah, call her daddy. Yeah.

Mel: Yeah. And she says, she says, I've never had an orgasm from penetrative sex.

Suzie: Yeah, I thought that's true.

Mel: We've discussed that. Yeah, it's very common. So I think that is also a thing that if, if, if you don't, then it's not. It's like, well, so here's the thing.

Suzie: So if Grazia says that sex only lasts average from 7 to 13 minutes,

but a woman doesn't orgasm until 15 to 20. Why do we think that no women are having orgasms? Right. It's because last sex isn't lasting as long and there's obviously no foreplay being had if you're only doing it for seven to 13 minutes.

Right?

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: Like, women need more time to warm up.

Mel: Right.

Suzie: To engorge the ******** and all these other.

Mel: Engorge the ********. Wow.

Suzie: You know, all these other technical terms. Um, yeah. Women need a little bit of time to just like get things moving, get the blood going.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: Men get hard by the wind, right?

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: And they are.

Mel: It's different.

Suzie: It's so different.

Mel: I mean, I think as men get older, that also changes.

Suzie: Oh, yeah.

Mel: They need more stuff going on, but I think that that is a big issue and they're not really asking that question. If you like the penetrative bit,

don't dislike the old, you know, heave ho, shunting in and out sort of thing.

Suzie: There's another penetrative bit.

Mel: What are you talking about? That's what I'm saying. Oh, yeah. If you enjoy it, but you actually can't climax from it.

Suzie: I love penetrative sex, but I've never come from only penetrative sex.

Mel: Right, but no, but what I mean is a lot of women have the foreplay.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: Have the penetrative sex.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: And they like it. They do not orgasm. It's got nothing.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: The length. They will never orgasm. They have to stimulate, you know, fingers, toys, whatever it is, or they have to do something afterwards.

Suzie: But while you're getting infiltrated, you are hopefully also touching your ****.

Mel: I think a lot of women aren't.

Suzie: Oh, my God.

Mel: I mean, a lot.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: And that's a big, I would say a big piece of advice. A do that or use a toy,

do it all and, you know, just get your partner on board. But I think how would your partner.

Suzie: Not be on board with you literally giving them a show of what you like? How could your partner lot like that?

Mel: Well, look, if. If it was that easy, all these people wouldn't.

Suzie: I think people are just very ashamed about it for no, not no reason, but like, people are shamed from their own thoughts and they're not actually shamed from anyone else. Do you know what I mean?

Mel: Oh, yeah.

Suzie: So that's what's kind of hard about the whole thing, right?

Mel: Where.

Suzie: Where it's like men don't. I mean, I don't know if they don't know. I think they just can't last. Right?

Mel: No. 100% they can't. And. And also, you know, they're like, you know, how long are we going to be doing this?

Suzie: Right.

Mel: For a lot of people it's like, okay, you know, what's for dinner? You know, getting bored.

And like you said, it can be uncomfortable after a certain period of time.

Suzie: Absolutely.

Mel: Which is why I do find, and I know you're gonna hate this, the whole like Bonnie Blue thing, those **** stars is how do you have a thousand penises? I mean, the pain.

Anyway, I digress. But I think the answer is it's different for everyone. It depends on what you need or what you enjoy or whatever.

Every.

I think we've talked about this before. I think a lot of men particularly don't understand that women. And we're not all built the same. We're all different.

Suzie: Oh my God, we're all very different. Every single *****, every single ****** is different.

Mel: It's different.

Suzie: Just like all your penises, how are different?

Mel: Yeah, but they sort of generically function sort of in the same way.

Suzie: That's true.

Mel: Whereas women have a lot of moving parts because it can. Like I said, you know, some women actually do orgasm only from penetrative sex. Not very many. And some women have to have lots of things.

And some women can do all of the above.

Suzie: Yeah. And some women even like one side of their ***** will be. Will have more like nerve endings than the other side. It's like so definitely saying so that.

Mel: That really is the thing. And I think there's also the fact that there's an article about it or multiple articles about it. There's a huge amount of pressure. Like I think ever since.

Yeah. Ever since Steven Stings then in the 90s that he had sex a thons with whatever his wife is called. I don't know what this is sex. And they'd have sex for sort of three hours.

Like tantric.

Suzie: That's like not penetrative sex for three hours.

Mel: No idea.

Suzie: There's no way that's. That's what that is. Right.

Mel: Just.

Suzie: Also, tantric sex is very cool. I've never had an actual experience with tantric sex, but I've heard amazing things because a lot of it is mind over body. So like your breath work, your like sensuality and stuff like that.

There's no way you're having penetrative sex for three hours. I personally love a session like a long sesh, three hours, but not penetrative Sesh.

Mel: Three hours. No, not.

Suzie: I've never had sex for three hours, but I have had sex for like an hour. And then you hang, like, you chill and then you go back to it.

Mel: Yeah, yeah, of course.

Suzie: But, like, it's great to have, like, if you can, and you have the time and you have the energy to like, have a really long, amazing session of just like. And not just penetrative sex.

That's not what just sex is. I think that's what a lot of people don't understand is that sex is not just ***** and ******.

Mel: No, it isn't.

Suzie: But people are very confused by that. Right?

Mel: People confused.

Suzie: Like, you know, you have to.

Mel: You.

Suzie: I'm sorry, guys, but you have to eat your girls out. You have to. Some people, you have to lick her ********.

Mel: And I will say that I'm shocked by.

Suzie: You have to.

Mel: People don't do that.

Suzie: You have to. And just like, how you guys. Men will. It's just like how men will be like, I need ********.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: It's the exact same for us. We need fingers. We need things going around.

Mel: Absolutely. And. But it's. But it's this thing that I think there's just so much pressure. Yeah. So going back to the Sting thing is like, people are not. Like, people are bullshitting you.

They are not having three hour or.

Suzie: But that's only because people are thinking that penetrative sex is the only way to have sex.

Mel: Yes. And that. That actually, that bit is kind of the end sort of crescendo bit, like all the other stuff. You should. Because you. You can't. It's not. It's not comfortable for women.

For the whole. For a long.

Yeah, for the whole. That was funny. Very good. Very good fun. Yeah. It's not comfortable for long periods of time, for obvious reasons. The older you get, the worse that gets.

Suzie: Oh, yeah.

Mel: And for men, it's like, you know, any man who could have staying power hasn't got that much staying power. I mean, come on.

Suzie: Can be three hours. That's a really long time. But there is.

Mel: Or one. One hour just doing penetration. That's ridiculous. Well, no, I mean, one hour just.

Suzie: Well, just penetration.

Mel: But there is one hour of penetration.

Suzie: Whole thing about.

Mel: Well done.

Suzie: We've. We've. I think we've had an episode on this where we talked about edging.

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: And edging, which I'm assuming is what also Sting is doing if we want to go back to the 90s. But edging is the best way to have a long Prolonged orgasm or a prolonged, like, session.

Because if you're not allowing yourself to come and you're just building up the, like, excitement about it together, you're also just kind of like, teasing each other, which is, like, really fun, then.

Yeah. Of course you're gonna be able to last a little bit longer than if you're just, like, pounding it and then coming right away. And then everyone's kind of left unsatisfied.

Mel: Yeah, I mean. Yeah, very good point. But I do think it just. It just depends for everyone. Depends what you enjoy.

Suzie: Well, I think people just don't experiment either.

Mel: No, I don't think they do.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: I don't think they do. I don't think, you know, in the world and the way we live, people have the capacity, the bandwidth, the time. And it gets worse.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: The longer you're into a relationship, you know, you're tired.

Even if you don't have children, you're just tired and you want to, like, you know, get to it. And I'm like, okay. And that. That is a problem. You know, and then Saturdays and Sundays, people just fill their time with too much other ****.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: So then they don't have time and life takes over and it's not a good thing at all.

And I think that,

yeah, again, people don't communicate. They don't talk to each other. They don't talk about what they need or what works for them. It's surprising the amount of people that don't.

And then it's this thing we've talked about before, or people have told us about their stories where they don't talk about it at the beginning, that there's a problem and that hurts your relationship so much.

Suzie: So upsetting when, like, you get to a point where you think that, you know and you like the person.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: But you've been faking your orgasms.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: For a month.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: And it's like, well, now, how do you think that they.

Mel: They don't.

Suzie: They don't know how to make you come.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: And.

Mel: Absolutely.

Suzie: And I think we have to stop being okay with the short time sex. Obviously, quickies love a quickie. Especially if the ladies are using toys.

That's the only way I'm able to come in a quickie. It's like extremely hard for just anything else.

But, like,

we just have to stop being okay with the fact that, like, seven minutes is the norm. Seven minutes should not be the norm. Right.

Mel: Like, up to sex, it does involve two people where women tend to like more time because they need More men on the whole don't need more time. But you, you, you need a man who is interested in you, who's interested in making you.

Suzie: Why are we having sex if that's not the case?

Mel: I think lots of people having sex where so upsetting.

Where it's a single minded thing. They're interested in their own thing that's going on as opposed to how's the other person doing. So therefore it will be better. Yeah,

I think that's a lot of people's case.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: And then just you, you know, the fact that we're talking about it is like,

does it matter? Like if you're having fun and you're enjoying. If it is 13 minutes and you're very happy and that works for you.

Suzie: I know that's great.

Mel: Thirteen minutes once a week, three times a week. I don't. Whatever it is. And that works and you're happy and it really good. Great.

You know, so it just doesn't matter. The problem is obviously when one person isn't happy, which is what this article is about, which is probably what happens most of the time.

Yeah. That one person is like not happy at all.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: Not. They're not orgasming, they're just not happy. It's not enough. It's not. I think it's also a lot to do with. It's not intimate enough. 100% not enough caring from the other person.

And again, it's not about love.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: It's about. It's very nice if there is love too. It very good. But it's about the other person being interested in you taking the time. It's like anything in life, if somebody gives you the time,

it means a lot.

Suzie: How is this? Like this should be like you're saying this has probably doesn't happen often. Like how is this not happening often? So like when I was in van just from vacation, when I was with a gentleman and a gentleman friend and we.

We had sex. I'll tell you a little secret, Mel. We had sex every day that I was there and that was four weeks.

I'm sure you did sex every day at least 30 minutes long.

Mel: Every day. Okay.

Suzie: And it was like I've never had that time obviously where I could just literally come every day. And it just does something to your personality, to your psyche where you're just like, oh, this is, this is what life is about.

It sounds so ridiculous, but it's like, how are people living in any other way where sex is not this enjoyable?

Mel: Yeah. Or that you kind of.

Suzie: And I Understand, there's life that gets involved in all these things. But it's like. God. To give yourself that kind of gift of an orgasm.

Mel: Yeah. But I. I mean. I mean, there are several things obviously going on there. I'll be the doctor in the situation, please. Situation is number one. You were in another location and it's hot, so it's sexier.

Yeah. To you, kind of. You were in like between jobs, so your mind is not thinking about other stuff.

And you're also in this kind of. You're in this vacation mood. So you're in a good mood.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: And you're also in a place where there's not a lot of other stuff going on.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: It's not like there's all these restaurants, all these shops, all these. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I don't know, like whatever people do. It's not like you're in the middle of New York.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: And you're doing stuff.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: There's not a lot. There's a beach. There's the pole.

Suzie: Yep.

Mel: There's the one or two bars, 100. And then the sexy time.

Suzie: No. Yeah. I mean, like, I don't expect people to live their lives like this, but the fact that like, if you, if you. I'm not even saying like have sex every day, like that's unbelievable.

If you could even have sex every day for a week, like, that is crazy. But like if, if you are able to just give yourself the time that you need for one orgasm a day or like one orgasm a week or something where you're just like, your partner's giving that to you,

you're giving that to yourself. I want to like over state that because I feel like women do not give themselves their own orgasms. We like rely way too much on a partner to do that for us.

But like just having the,

like. I don't know, it's like that. It's like the self love, which I hate that term, but like, it's that self love where you like, you should be giving yourself.

It's self care. That's all.

Mel: I agree. And you know, you know, when they. Men use these horrible expressions like that woman just needs a good, you know, *******. Yeah. Thank you. You said it. Or like, you know, in the sort of 19th century, they'd say women are sort of hysterical.

Suzie: Oh, yeah.

Mel: And it's true.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: That women particularly. And I saw it was so many. It was some funny comedian. Oh, it was a guy in England. There's nobody who knows. It doesn't matter. And he was talking about how when he has sex and it's like, oh, you know, I've come.

That's great. I feel really good. And that's it. Whereas women, it's more. It is more of a full body experience. Obviously, that's impossible for us to know because I don't know what it's like for men.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: But it's more of a full kind of release, is my understanding. You can let us know.

Suzie: For women or for men?

Mel: For women, yeah, of course. Like, it's a full. Like it goes through your body to the ends of your toes.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: And so if you imagine, if you think about that, how much tension is in your body for that to be possible.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: And so if you release it all the time, of course it's going to be good. And like you said, if you're going to let somebody take care of you, love you, whatever, for that period of time, every day, of course that's a good thing.

That could not possibly be a bad thing.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: But I think that, as we all know, it's just very difficult in life. It's very difficult.

Suzie: Oh, my God. I can't.

Mel: It's the distractions.

Suzie: I can't even imagine kids. Like, I find it hard to, like, have sex with my dog in the same place with me. You know what I mean? Like, it's just. Yeah.

Like, it's. It's extremely distracted.

Mel: There are distractions. The other thing is, I know when you were staying there, I know there's some social life, but it's not like, I could be wrong. You're like going to a dinner.

You're not socializing.

Suzie: Oh, no, no, no. Yeah.

Mel: You stay very much kind of in the villa or the house or whatever.

And so that also you're making your own entertainment, which obviously is a great thing. I just think it's.

I think a lot of people think about this and then the reality is it doesn't transpire. And I think. I do think generally the male mind is much better at going, you know, **** it, let's just do that.

Like, forget about the washing, forget about dinner, forget about the thing you're supposed to be doing. Just do this. Yeah, Men are very good at that. My husband's an absolute genius at that.

But women find it very difficult. Cause they're thinking about. And it's annoying when you feel yourself doing it, thinking about, I've got to do this piece of work, I got to do the washing, I got to put that away.

I got to do that with the children and your mind. And you're like, stop.

But it's very, very, very hard. Yeah.

Suzie: Our brain doesn't turn off as you see it.

Mel: And then that is a huge turnoff for men. Like, oh, my God, who cares about the frigging dishes? Which obviously don't matter. But in your mind as a woman, you're like, well, who's gonna do it?

Suzie: Hafe. Exactly.

Mel: This army of maids come in. I've gotta do it. So. But obviously, if you let yourself go. Yeah, but I say to you this. I say this to you all the time.

Susie, you're a very unusual person, I know in many ways. And that you have this capacity to prioritize, to understand that about yourself. To be honest with you, I think most women, it takes a lifetime.

Suzie: It's actually so funny. I was thinking about that the other day. I was like, why am I like this? Like, it's just the weirdest. It's the weirdest thing. I'm like, why did I turn out like this?

And why do most people not turn out like this? Because I didn't have a ridiculous childhood. I'm not, like, super traumatized. I'm not. Do you know what I mean? Like, there's nothing in my life that I could be like, oh, pinpoint this.

And it's not like I've been to therapy, so maybe they could, but I've just like, why do I turn out that I'm so comfortable with sex? I'm so happy to, like, give that part of myself to me, which is, like.

It feels like it is almost my whole. Not my whole world, but, like, it's such a big part of my life, and I put so much energy into it, too.

Right. Like, we. You know, you reap what you sow.

Mel: Right.

Suzie: And I think a lot about sex during the day, as I'm sure more. Most. Like, a lot of people do, but a lot of women don't admit to.

Mel: Doing that many times a day.

Suzie: I mean, I don't count how many times a day. But I think about sex a lot during the day.

Mel: Like, every hour.

Suzie: Maybe every hour. But, like, it's a thought and then it goes away. Right.

Mel: Most men, they say they think about it is less than that. It's more. It's more than that, isn't it?

Suzie: I'm assuming it's more than that.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: Obviously it depends on the day, too.

Mel: I mean, like, the funny. The funny thing, like, there's this sort of,

you know, tick tock, you know, when everyone's. What's. When everyone's doing the same thing. You know what I mean? Like not a fashion, like a thing.

Suzie: Trend.

Mel: Yeah, trend. That's the word. It's been a long day. It's a long day. And the one of them is really funny. Like, you know, like the man, you're in the kitchen and you're like putting the garbage away and you sort of bend over, you brush by your husband.

Yeah. And he gets.

No, it's not even that. Like, you just happen to touch him and he gets all horned up. Yeah. And I think it's funny and I think it's a really nice trend.

I don't think it's that common that.

Suzie: What?

Mel: That like you brush by your husband and all you horny. Yeah. I think women would like it to be the trend.

Suzie: Really.

Mel: But it isn't. I don't think so.

Suzie: My friend actually sent this thing, this one to me, this friend to me. And it was like this. This girl and she was like,

if women acted as their husbands do around the house, like. And so like, you know how like you're just like going about your day and your guys just like grabbing your ****.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: You know what I mean?

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: Or like grabbing your *** or whatever. And so that's like obviously in this video, it's like the girl doing it to the guy. And I'm like, no, that's literally how I am all the time.

Like, if I have a man in my house, I'm grabbing his **** all the time. I'm grabbing his *** all the time.

Mel: You're like a man's.

Suzie: I mean, I. I am.

Mel: You're a man's dream.

Suzie: I'm like a habit.

Mel: It's like my husband always says to me, you know, if. Because he. He is very like demonstrative. Very like, you know, full on.

Suzie: He loves you.

Mel: He does. And he's like, other women would love this. That their husbands would.

Suzie: I think most women don't.

Mel: Well, I think we say we don't, but when they don't do it, we're like, what's going on?

Suzie: Right.

Mel: 100%. Which is extremely confusing to men. You're just like, well, I stopped doing it. Cause you don't like it. But I want to be doing it. But then I'll start doing it again.

Then you'll complain.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: And so you're like a man's dream.

Suzie: I just. I love being touched. I love touching my guy or whoever. I mean, that's my friends even different.

Mel: You do are very touching.

Suzie: I'm like. I'm like holding her foot right now. I know. You Guys can't see it.

Mel: You do. You're like, as. Yeah.

Suzie: And I guess my connection piece.

Mel: Well, I guess that's how you connect to the world.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: You need it.

Suzie: Yeah. People are different that way.

Mel: But are your parents very cuddly and affectionate?

Suzie: My mom is affectionate, but I wouldn't say she's like me affectionate. You know what I mean? Like.

Mel: Cause my parents are.

Suzie: Oh, that's British though, isn't it?

Mel: Yeah. I think they. There's an extra ******* layer on top of them. But it's very, you know. Yeah. And I don't. And I talked about this before and I won't go on about it because it's got nothing to do with this.

But I don't have a good relationship. My mom, my mum would come towards me and, like, hug me. And I just. I just don't want you in my aura.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: So it's interesting how. What does that do to your brain? And later in relationships and stuff like that, like, you know, you can just get away from me.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: So why have you become. I don't know.

Suzie: I don't know. I don't know why some people are super interested or like, you know, positive about sex or like, you know, sex positive. I don't know why people are like that.

And some people are super.

I mean,

shame, obviously, like, parents have a huge part in that, I'm assuming. Religion has a huge part in that, I'm assuming. But I always felt, like, super open with it. It's like a weird thing.

Mel: You have. No,

you have a complete pathway to it. You have nothing in the world. Yeah, exactly. And that's very interesting because a lot of people. And it's got nothing to do with age.

And our whole podcast is about the fact that we're different ages. And I don't think it has anything to do with age. Cause I've seen many young people who are very hung up and wound up about sex or talking about.

Or just being comfortable around anything to do with that. I don't think it's necessarily age. It's the person, isn't it? And that you just don't have this.

Suzie: Kind of like your brain neurons are completely, like, fixed in one way.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: Do you know what I mean? And they're just like. The pathways are all there.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: But then my pathways for math are just, like, dwindling.

Mel: There's nothing.

Suzie: There's like. There's sparks happening and nothing's actually going on. But a *****.

Mel: A *****.

Suzie: I know. A **** and ball Completely connect.

Mel: **** and balls connected to that.

But go back to the original they were talking about. Yeah, you see length of time she's back on thinking about balls. Is that. Is that how long it should be?

And obviously for you it's a person. And so. That is a good point. So for you, you like touch.

Suzie: You're right. I'm foreplaying all day long.

Mel: Some people don't.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: I mean, I know that's not that they don't. They just don't need it in quite the quantity. You need it 100.

Suzie: 100. And if you need it. If everyone needed it as much as I needed it, honestly, we'd have a more peaceful.

Mel: If we get anything done.

Suzie: No, we'd have a more peaceful earth.

Mel: That's true. We wouldn't have any warm.

Suzie: If everyone was having sex regularly and having orgasms regularly, we would have such a better time.

Mel: Do you think all the leaders of the world need to. That's the problem.

Suzie: They all need to get ******. Literally.

Mel: Well, I think some of them are. It's just who they're getting ****** by. But is the question. But yeah. I mean, now look, I completely agree with you. I just think it's actually.

For you it's very easy. I think for the mass. It is not easy. Otherwise there wouldn't be articles about, you know, seven to third. I mean it's ridiculous. Inane. Seven to 13 minutes.

Suzie: What the **** is that?

Mel: Even seconds or whatever it is.

Is it because also people are in long term relationships and they're not sort of that attracted to each other, so they just want to get over it. Absolutely. Bish bosh, let's get it done.

Suzie: I know my last relationship, it was not this. I wasn't doing it every day. I wasn't doing it for an hour at a time every day.

Having as many orgasms, getting over and done with.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: Because you kind of have to. You have to do stuff to keep the relationship going. I completely know what that's like.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: It's just to kind of get yourself in another mindset of being like, I have to give it to myself.

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: This is my responsibility. This is my. Just like I do my facials, I take off my makeup. Every day I have my orgasm.

Mel: I honestly, I agree with you.

Suzie: Does that feel good? Wouldn't that be nice?

Mel: Does it feel good for me to agree with you?

Suzie: No, it just, I mean I would just.

Mel: I think you're right. You're right.

Suzie: Feels so good.

Mel: When the other thing is like you think about how Much time. Every so much time you spend like doing stupid **** like scrolling whatever, you.

Suzie: Could be having an orgasm that time.

Mel: It could be having half an hour in the. Wherever. In wherever. Lock yourself away.

Suzie: I've just. I've just thought about sex 50 times in this amount of.

Mel: I bet you have 50.

Suzie: How long have I been speaking for?

Mel: But the thing is, you also were in a place where you were not like lots of other people around. That does help, doesn't it?

Suzie: Oh, yeah, of course.

Mel: All these things.

Suzie: There's so many factors in this.

Mel: Like you're not gonna get disturbed. You can. You're not worried, you're not tense.

Suzie: Can I tell? I'm. And like, we're in Canada, so this is very legal. And I will say this. If you guys are able to smoke a little joint of legal weed.

Very legal. Very legal marijuana.

It does some and depends on the strain. And you can. If you. If it's legal, you can go to a little store and you can ask the people about it.

There are amazing strains of marijuana that you can get that will help your orgasm and that will make you last longer and it will blow your ******* mind. I will.

Mel: But also just relax you. Exactly. To get to a place where, like you said, you can allow yourself 100% and stop thinking about the washing and the. Whatever you're thinking about in your head.

Stupid ****. Like I've got to do this spreadsheet in the morning or whatever you're worried about. It's hard to do that. I think it's really hard. And if you're in a setting.

So I mean, maybe that's the answer, is that you should. You. Not everyone obviously can go and spend a month in the Bahamas. We're not all Susie Schachter.

Suzie: Sorry.

Mel: But what you can do is kind of in your life, the regular life, you do as much as you can, as it were. And then when you go on vacation again without children, preferably, I think not.

Right. You have time and you just allow yourself. I think that's a very good word. Allow yourself to have some time and just stop worrying about the stupid little **** in life.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: Don't worry about what anybody else thinks. Love that. Worry about the person you're with. Love that. Yeah. Do you like that?

Suzie: Sweet.

Mel: And don't.

Suzie: Don't forget to communicate about what you want and your needs. I know Mel loves a communication station.

Mel: I know this person. I'm very into. Very good. Yeah.

Suzie: But yeah, just make sure you're communicating about your actual pleasure needs. It's very important pleasure.

Mel: I love. Keep it up. Okay?

Suzie: We'll end it there. I think that's enough.

Mel: We need a glass of wine.

Suzie: God, we do love you guys so much. If you guys have anything to say about this, maybe you have had an amazing, amazing session like I have. Or maybe you like to keep it short and sweet.

Let us know@sharemytuth.com we're going to share my truth pod.

Love you.

Mel: Bye.

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Mel: Thanks so much for listening. Please rate and review this podcast and follow us on social at sharingmytruthpod and leave us a voicemail on our website sharingmytruth.com to share your stories and experiences with us.

We'll see you next time.

Suzie: Bye bye. 3, 2, 1.