Suzie: Welcome to Sharing My Truth with Mel and Suzie. The uncensored version where we bear it all.

Mel: We do. 1, 2, 3, 4.

Suzie: And hello, everyone, and welcome back to Sharing My Truth Pod. You're here with Mel and Susie.

Thanks so much for tuning in with us today.

And here's a sweet little friendly reminder to subscribe to our YouTube channel if you're watching it there. Hey,

also, if you can download all of our episodes, if you can do it on your Spotify or your Apple podcasts, wherever you get your podcasts, you can also go to sharemytruth.com where you can share your own truths with us via voicemail or email.

We'd love to hear from you. And while you're at it, you can also go to Share My Truth Pod on any of our socials, that is our Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, of course, and Facebook,

if you're into that kind of thing.

You can DM us. And we'd love to hear from you.

Mel: Hey, babes. Wow. Hello, darling.

Suzie: Trying to do that in one breath.

Mel: And it's a lot.

Suzie: Really tough.

Mel: Yeah, but it's a lot.

Suzie: Yeah, it is a lot. How are you?

Mel: I'm fabulous. It's all good. Everything's good.

Suzie: She's officially an empty nester, by the way. Everyone. Woo. The school year has arrived.

Mel: W starts. Yeah.

Suzie: Party starts with the parents.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: I've actually decided that I'm going to move in. That's actually how that's going to go.

Mel: You're like, what? Yeah, it's like they do come back.

Suzie: No, no, no. Their daughter's gonna come home and then I'm gonna be actually moved in. Yeah, in their. Both of their rooms. Mowgli, my dog is gonna have his own room and then I'm gonna have the other one.

And that's fabulous.

Mel: It is for you.

Suzie: Yeah,

can't wait.

So our friendly little episode today, we had an amazing comment on our YouTube.

If you guys go to our YouTube, obviously we have all of our videos there from all of our episodes, but we also have our little shorts and everything like that you can get little clips of.

But this one listener actually commented on one of our videos and we really love this comment and he wanted us to chat about this experience he had. So we're gonna go ahead.

I'm gonna go ahead and read it.

We'll chat a little bit about it.

Here we go.

So he says,

this year, as a man, I've made the determination to.

Yeah,

I'm just going to do that.

Mel: Again.

Suzie: This year as a Man. I've made the determination to approach more women.

Not necessarily to ask them out, but simply to compliment them or engage a little small talk to build my flirting muscles. It's gone really well so far.

We love this.

Mel: We do.

Suzie: One thing I noticed, a good number of women seemed surprised. Pleasantly. Thankfully. Lol. When I complimented them, I got the impression that they hadn't been approached or complimented by a man in a while,

even though they were conventionally gorgeous.

He says.

Let's talk about the women who don't really expect men to approach them either because it hasn't happened in a while or ever.

I wonder if some women have pushed the idea of a guy stepping up to the back of their minds so when it does happen, they're caught off guard. From your perspectives,

is that actually the case? And how do women really feel about those unexpected approaches? When interacting with women who have become pessimistic about dating and have started doubting their own attractiveness due to never being approached, how can men help them lose their pessimism and feel better about dating and themselves?

Thanks for all your content.

We love you. Thank you for your comment.

Mel: Mel, what do you think? Well, firstly, I would like to congratulate this man. I assume he's a young man. Congratulate him on actually living in the real world.

Suzie: I'm obsessed with him. The fact that he's like approaching women with no expectations of just being like, I'm gonna go and compliment this person and make their day hopefully.

Mel: But he's like consciously decided. Okay.

Suzie: Yes.

Mel: Online is a bit of a **** fest. Right. And I'm gonna go out into the world because we're all apparently terrified of the world because of all the things that have happened in probably the last five years.

Covid, Bl, blah, blah. And we all live in this weird bubble. Yes. That he's actually gonna go out and be a normal person and talk to people in the real world.

Suzie: Yes.

Mel: Wow. You know, groundbreaking. But like amazing now I think that's amazing. And because of that, he'll probably meet somebody now.

In answer to his question, I think this is where women we are our own worst enemy. Because even by the way he writes, he sounds like he's quite a charming kind of funny guy.

If you are approached. And I would caveat before anybody comes at me. As you get older, this obviously changes. But when you're approached by a man or a man jokes and laughs.

If he's charming, not necessarily,

like he says, conventionally good looking. But if he's funny and charming and just Has a nice aura,

you're fine with it. Yes, that's the huge kind of hypocrisy. Obviously it probably helps if he's relatively nice looking or just not hideous.

That's not very nice, is it? No, but it's the truth.

If a man. Most women, if a man gives you the creep. The creep. You have your creep da as a woman. And if anything about him, like he comes into your aura and you just feel you get the creeps,

you just know it. And so if you are a man who doesn't give that off,

it's generally fine. And women think it's. Of course they think it's great. Cause. And especially nowadays, obviously when I was younger, it was completely normal. Men came up to you all the time.

But nowadays they don't.

In my case, I do find men talk to me, but they're older men,

you know, or sometimes there's the young man in the supermarket. Yes. Maybe they. Maybe it's a weird mother thing. I don't know. But.

I don't know. But maybe that's different. But I know, like you've said to me many times,

and this is just like, if nobody's approaching you,

you're all ******. Young women, you're screwed. Because if you just the way you look, the way you present yourself,

your personality,

blah, blah, blah. If men don't approach you on a regular basis, it's like, oh my God, what is going on? Yeah, but definitely if the. If a man is. Is.

Is. Is nice, is charming, is funny,

he's not creepy, then of course women like it.

Suzie: Well, I think there are. Men are still kind of realizing that there is a difference besides,

like,

there's a difference between a guy cat calling and like trying to get a woman's attention and being like, hey, sweetheart, nice ****. Like, okay, like, sir, get the. Away from me.

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: That's different than an actual genuine compliment.

Mel: That happened to me recently.

Suzie: Of course it did, because you got nice.

Mel: J. I was walking by a build like a construction thing here.

Suzie: Yes.

Mel: And the. There was all these guys and they were all speaking Spanish. I don't know where they're from, but they were wherever. There was some from somewhere where they speak Spanish.

And I walked past and they said, oh, grande in the conversation.

Suzie: And you speak Spanish.

Mel: Yeah, I understand a bit. And I'm like.

Suzie: I walked on and they looked like. Oh, they looked a little like water because I knew what they said and.

Mel: It was me because there was nobody in the street.

Suzie: Well, you got the nicest and you.

Mel: Know My **** do enter the room before I do. But no, but it was me. And I thought that was really funny because they would never have said it in English.

Suzie: No, of course not.

Mel: But anyway, that's.

Suzie: By the way, I just thought that was funny thing to have. But this is the thing. It's like, it's like, are you funny? Are you trying? Of course. But like, this is like,

you know, you're walking by, like, this isn't like,

you're like men who like approach women in the street and like catch them off guard for one. And so women are also very aware of the surroundings, usually like scared.

We're, we are,

we are in a predator, prey kind of situation at all times. And I think men should realize that more.

We are constantly looking for the best exit. We are constantly looking for the safest person to go get help with. And so I feel like just men should realize that there is certain situations where women do want to be approached and we are happy and we aren't going to like combat you almost because we are kind of defensive if we're like in a public space or like we're alone in the street or something like that.

Because we're also like not. We're not in a safe environment a lot of the time. So I think that's something that men maybe have to realize. But if you are like, let's say like you're in a public space with a lot of other people, like you're in a bar,

you're in a supermarket, you're in anywhere else that, that you know, you aren't just alone in a like room with a woman and she doesn't, she might not feel like she's prey or something,

then yeah, we don't mind a compliment. Or,

and if it's the women who,

and I do. I know women who are rude and when they, when a man approaches, if they like aren't interested, like if they're not attractive or whatever. I know women who are super rude.

And gentlemen, I'm actually so sorry about these women because it's not, it's not all women, which is so sad.

But like the.

So I, I encourage the women out there to accept a compliment with grace and just allow yourself to thank that person. And if they ask you out or ask for your number, just kindly be like, I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend or I'm sorry, like I'm just not interested and,

and just do it kindly and not be a ***** about it.

But men don't stop giving women compliments because you're worried that she's going to scream and yell. Like, that's really not the majority of women. I don't think.

Mel: No, I don't think it is. So I'd say a couple of things. Is I think the right, like lovely, charming men,

they know when to do this. They know, like, I'll give you an example about,

probably about. I think it was last Christmas.

I was with my older daughter who was 20 at the time, and we came out of the subway,

maybe this is.

We were going to dinner. We came out, suddenly, it's kind of dark, it's wintry.

And you know, she's a very attractive young woman. This man, this tall man who was actually attractive and sort of her age sees her and comes up to her and starts talking to her and say, hey.

And I'm just like.

And she's just like.

And, and. And obviously we walk on. But it was just like, are you for real? Like, it is dark,

it is snowing.

You are outside a subway station. This is super,

super creepy, right? And you know, obviously that's a very obvious one. But I think the men who.

Suzie: Obviously not that obvious because he's still dead, right?

Mel: But men who are, you know, well adjusted and nice men, however, one turn that they know there are situations that you don't do it because the women are scared and that you are gonna come off looking like a ******* weirdo.

And they also know,

they know how to read the situation. They read the room and that's what you need to do. But going to your comment about women, I think we are our own worst enemy.

And even I was saying before, as you get older, it changes so different kind of people approach you.

And even in my situation,

I've had quite a few situations where I'm with one of my daughters and they're like, oh,

your mom looks like your sister or something weird like that.

And you know, and you know, they're a bit. And they're older men, so they're trying to,

you know, talk to me, which I always find really bizarre.

Why?

Suzie: Because you're an attractive older lady?

Mel: No, I mean like a lot. Well, okay, that's very nice, but a lot older.

It's just a weird thing to do, I think if, you know, you're with somebody who's probably your daughter. But I think that. So that definitely changes. But even then when I know it's a situation, okay, this person is probably not 100% or whatever it is.

I know how to be pleasant.

Don't be bitchy and kind of gently back away.

Suzie: Absolutely.

Mel: And that is what. And I seen a lot of young women, and I think it is a phenomenon that is sort of recent.

Young women, I mean, women kind of 35 and younger,

who are just instantly so combative.

Suzie: So defensive.

Mel: So defensive, yeah. So aggressive and really quite nasty. And then they're surprised they don't have a boyfriend. Right. They're like,

wow. And you don't have a date,

but they actually don't know why they don't have a date. They don't know the vibes they give off and how you could be the most attractive woman in the world if you are aggressive, combative.

That's it. It's just so unpleasant.

Suzie: You attract the energy, the vibes that you give off.

Mel: Absolutely.

Suzie: So, like, what do you expect is gonna happen?

Mel: Absolutely. And I just think that,

like, stop.

You know, obviously, you need to protect yourself, and as a woman, you have to know these boundaries and you have to be smart about it,

but don't always be so ready to have a fight,

you know, and it's always a fight and sort of. Get away from me, you freak. To quote. Who's that? Alycia Silverstone or something? That's from ages ago.

Suzie: Clueless.

Mel: Clueless, yeah. But that is basically the if. And the hypocrisy is often with women, if he's not, like, this conventionally super attractive man,

then instantly you're like, ew. And you're like, well, who are you exactly? Like, you know, like, you know,

get real.

If he's a nice guy and he's just having,

you know, just being charming or having.

He's not doing anything weird. He's just making a comment.

What's the problem?

Suzie: No, I was out for dinner with my girlfriends, and we were having, like, a nice girlfriend dinner. And, like, we were in this really, like, hip, cute place. And I remember, like, at the end of our dinner, we all stood up and this guy, like, walks by, and I mean,

like, he's not my type, but it's not like he was hideous or anything, but, like, hideous Pullman. No, he wasn't. Like, he was. Yeah, yeah. So he. He just, like, he stopped me and he's like.

He's like, oh, like, you're so beautiful. Like, can I ask for your number? Like, you know, I'd love to take you out or whatever he said. And I was just like, oh, that's really sweet, but, like, no, thank you.

Like, I'm. I'm. I. I may have said I had a boyfriend or I'm just Like, not interested. I can't remember what I said, but no, no, no, it's totally fine.

And he took it really well and whatever and it was just a nice interaction. It didn't like whatever happened. And I just remember one or two of my girlfriends who I was with, they were like, they're like, oh my God, you were so nice.

I would not have been that nice. I was like, why?

Mel: Like, well, exactly.

Suzie: For one, that was a compliment.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: Like two, I'm just like, he did it in a really nice way and it was not rude at all or creepy or anything. It was just like,

like I, I, I, and I actually what I usually do too, if, if it's like a, like a,

like a supermarket situation or anything like that, I will usually be like, you know what, I really, I'm not interested. But the next girl will be like, don't stop doing this.

Like, this is like, this is like a really nice thing that you just like said like I appreciate it. And there are so many other women who also will appreciate.

So I don't want like to deter men from complimenting women on the street in a nice non creepy way.

Mel: But I think, you know, going back to the, the comment from this listener on YouTube, I think this is the weird thing, and I will say this about women, we are complicated sometimes to the point of being ridiculous, is that on the one hand he's approaching women and they're surprised.

And that is because men are not approaching women in the modern world because they are terrified of A, the aggression, B, being sued, some kind of shitstorm happening.

And so they've just kind of naturally not doing it.

I mean, I think a lot of men still are doing it, but maybe less men. So maybe.

Suzie: No, they aren't though.

Mel: Yeah. And so. But then you complain when the men don't do it.

Suzie: Exactly.

Mel: And you're like, hang on, we've created the environment where it's not happening, you know.

Suzie: Well, the other problem is now it's.

Mel: Not happening and now we don't like it.

Suzie: No, exactly. It's social media is a huge problem because women are getting so many random compliments on social media.

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: And so they're used to getting a, it's like you're not getting approached but like you're usually getting like picked up in a digital way now.

Mel: Yeah. A lot of attention.

Suzie: So yeah. So you're like, oh,

so you, you know, think way more highly about yourself sometimes more women I think are actually think higher themselves when maybe they need to take a step back and let the ego go a little bit,

but, like, in a nice way. Like, just allow yourself to.

To have conversations with people who maybe you don't think are on your level. Like, let's just take a step down.

Mel: No, I. I know what you're saying. I think it is.

And again, this is gonna sound really old, but I think social media and the world that we live in and this is happening to men and women.

Suzie: Yeah.

Mel: Has told us all that we're all fabulous.

We can all. And, oh, I'm gonna get a lot of hate from this. We can all, like,

you know, be ginormous. We can all in, you know,

weights.

Yeah. In weight. We can be big, you know, and we can be fat. So I'm gonna just say it and that we're still gorgeous. It's like the Lizzo thing.

Suzie: I see.

Mel: Who now has lost weight, which is like.

Suzie: Of course.

Mel: Like,

you know, if you look at a lot of ads for,

you know, women's products, whatever they are, and they're showing lots of different types of bodies. Now, of course, there is a good side to that, because it's showing the reality that everyone doesn't look, like,

this. Perfect. Yeah. Which is ridiculous. But on the flip side, we're saying that that's not what people are attracted to, and it's just not true,

you know, and so we've been sold this bullshit, like, go out, be what you want, you know, have,

you know, be £300, you know,

don't do any. Wear any makeup, you know, don't shave your armpits, all this sort of ****, and everything will be fine. And I'd be the first person to say, do whatever you want.

Absolutely.

Suzie: Be.

Mel: If you don't want to shave your armpits, which I personally found disgusting, but that's completely fine.

Do it. But there are gonna be consequences,

you know, And I'm in no way. And I would never say that I'm in any way.

Always much to work on oneself. But I think that we've been sold this ridiculous idea that we're all amazing, we're all fabulous, we're all.

And it's not true. And I don't mean just about women. I mean men as well.

And it's just not real,

you know, And I think it's particularly happening for women. Cause women are keeping,

you know, going for men at the top of the pile. And they don't look at men who are kind of more in their.

Suzie: Range.

Mel: Yeah. Range. Yeah.

They're punching above their weight, to quote an old term.

And I think it's just. We've been sold this crazy idea. Yeah, we have. We really have been sold this idea and this. And you see it on, you know,

we've heard stories about it, like on dating apps. Like, you know, a man will obviously see the woman,

the picture of her, and obviously that's how he's judging it.

And then he gets there and she's like 20 pounds, 30 pounds heavier, which is fine. There's nothing wrong with that. But what is the point in putting the picture where you look the way you look 20 years,

15 years ago? It makes absolutely no sense. And then you would criticize the man for not liking you, but you've put yourself on an app where he's judging your appearance, which I know is **** and everything else.

And that's not nice.

Suzie: You're doing that to yourself.

Mel: That's what you're doing. And then, you know, so. And I just think we've.

We live in this world where,

yeah, we're told that we're all. It's fine to look like. Well, the only example I can think of is somebody like Lizzo. Like, it's fine to look like that and everything will be fine.

It just isn't. Because people judge everything about you. You walk into a room and they go, what is she wearing? What are her. This. What? It's like people analyze you, men and women.

And so, yeah, I just think that's ridiculous. And then women don't like it if they. If they.

They say, well, he's an ******* because he said, I'm this or I'm not this or I'm not.

Am I making any sense?

Suzie: No, you are. And I like that you brought up dating apps, because I think that's another huge problem with approaching. Because we are just expecting now to not meet people in person.

We are expecting now to just meet people online because we want to know their entire background and history and who they are and how much money they make and how tall they are and like, every tiny little detail and, like, what horoscope they are and like, all these ******* stupid things that don't actually matter.

And we don't. We are now relying on that to be like, oh, well, I'd rather know everything single thing about him so I'm not wasting time. And yet you are just not allowing yourself to actually feel a natural attraction or, like,

have a guy, like, have some confidence and, like, approach you and you're going to turn him down because, I don't know, he's five, eight, not six foot, like, it's crazy.

Mel: It's, it's, it's ridiculous. And I think there's something I often have conversations about. People ask me, like, you know, do you think the world is kind of talking about women's anxiety about, you know, being approached and stuff like that?

Do you think the world is actually more dangerous than it was 20, 30 years ago? And my answer is maybe. I mean, there are more people,

but I,

I honestly think there were the same amount of nutjobs and weird, creepy people.

We just didn't know about it.

So that's the other part of, like, you know, social media and the Internet, everything. We know all this stuff. So because you know all this stuff, it means you're so heightened, like, oh my God, he could be a serial killer.

Whereas like 20 years ago wouldn't even have occurred to you,

which isn't necessarily a good thing. I'm saying there's a good and a bad side to it. But we've just gone to this crazy,

haven't we, Level?

Suzie: Yeah, of course.

Mel: And so, yeah, sorry, I've gone off track.

Suzie: No, you haven't. I think,

I mean, this lovely listener's comment again, we thank him so much again for this.

What he wants to know too is like, how do we feel about these unexpected approaches, right? Like,

how do we stop the pessimism of these women, right?

Mel: Like, what.

Suzie: What are we as women gonna do about this, about this problem?

Mel: Well, I mean,

for him, in his case,

like I said, again, amazing that he's doing that.

And he sounds like a pretty well adjusted person. Obviously we don't know him, but his comment, he sounds pretty normal, well adjusted. That's a good way of putting it.

If he's gonna have a good approach and he's a nice guy and he gives off good energy and he has a good aura. Like the right kind of woman is gonna respond in the right way.

Absolutely. Yeah, he's gonna have to. And it sounds like he probably has accept that there's gonna be some women who are not gonna approach, not gonna answer in the right way.

And those are the women too, Just, okay, thank you and move on.

So in that case, for him, he said that he's getting good response, but the women who don't have a good response,

it's actually quite helpful to him.

It's answered in the first interaction that she's,

you know, not. She essentially's got some things to figure out.

So why,

what do we do about women being this pessimistic?

I don't know. It's an Individual thing. And I think you really are going to have to take a long hard look in the mirror, Susie, if you are a woman who is in her, you know, I guess your late twenties, 25 onwards is when you start to think about.

I know you think that's very young, but a lot of people start thinking about finding their mate, you know, so they're start. They're either with their mate that they're gonna marry or they're starting to like, okay, I gotta find.

Suzie: Or with their mate they're gonna divorce.

Mel: Yes, absolutely.

Yeah. Thank you, Susie. Or they're trying to find that person to be married by their. Maybe today, early 30s.

And I think you have to like,

be realistic. If you are gonna be so negative and so critical and so combative and so aggressive,

what the hell do you expect?

I know when you are dating,

dating is,

I'm sorry, today no different than 50 years, 100 years, 20 years ago. It's a game.

It's a kind of a numbers game. And you gotta meet people, see if you get along and you connect and that's it. It's not that complicated.

And you know, if you are going to be just kind of snarky and narky and have that.

I can't, I just can't bear that if you're going to have that initial super like aggressive. I'm a woman and I can do anything. And you're an. Because you're a man.

I mean, why bothering.

Suzie: I know I actually.

Mel: You should just not bother.

Suzie: And it's really sad. Like I.

Mel: On your own with a cat.

Suzie: I mean, and that's what a lot of them are doing.

Mel: But then they shouldn't be surprised. And I'm going to get a lot of. For this. You shouldn't be surprised because, you know this. Our whole podcast is about me being older and you being younger.

And I'm telling you from my experience,

my,

you know, excluding myself like my friends who are married and there's, you know, levels of attractiveness. But if you are a decent, nice,

fun, kind, warm person who presents. Well, let's put it that way. Yeah, you will. They have all found partners. They've all found husbands who. And the men the same way of women.

And they don't all look like whoever who we talk some amazingly gorgeous. Well, in your case, Tom Selleck. You like Tom Selleck?

They don't all look like Tom Selleck. And the women don't all look like.

Well, in the old days, Pamela Anderson. Right. They're just people.

Right. And. But they. Because they have a good energy and they're fun and they connect and, you know, it's. It's just not that complicated where. And I know it is very hard.

We're making it incredibly hard to meet people,

but I do think women are doing this thing of like. Like, you're saying if these young women were going.

Were criticizing you or not criticizing it, was shocked that you were, like, nice about it.

Suzie: Like, yeah, they were. It was literally.

Mel: But they would love it. They would love it if a man came up to them and said something.

Suzie: Well, if they were attractive enough, but.

Mel: The right kind of.

Suzie: If they were attractive enough for these women and it's.

Mel: Right. But who are you?

Suzie: Exactly? That's exactly what I'm saying. I'm like, you cannot be picky about this ****.

Mel: Get a grip. And it's just not fair. And it's also. It's this thing of, like,

you are judging everything on the outside,

like, from the apps. You are going for these men who are completely unattainable because they got the six pack and they look the way they do and all that sort of stuff.

Never been into a six pack myself.

Suzie: Me either.

Mel: I don't.

Suzie: Yeah, I'm much more of a girl who's like, if you can put back a ******* pasta.

Mel: Yeah, I love that. I've never. It's not of interest.

Suzie: Order everything off the menu.

Mel: Yeah,

it's. No,

you know,

but what. But what is the substance of the person behind that? Is this. Is this man. Is he funny? Is he charming? Is he good to be around? Is he just a nice guy?

I mean, come on,

you know, like.

Suzie: But some of these women actually do not want to meet anyone anymore. I think there's a lot of women who are literally in their, like, mid-30s and they're like.

Mel: So they just. They're giving up. Yeah, but are they giving up? So this. See, this guy's opened this whole hornets nest of conversation. Is. Are they giving up because they can't find this kind of typical that.

Sorry. This perfect person that they've created in them?

Suzie: Let me tell you in chat.

Mel: GPT.

Suzie: Let me. Let me tell you.

Mel: They haven't. Or is it because. Yeah, what is it then? Go on, then. It's. Tell me. It's.

Suzie: It's literally these women. Because I know a lot of them and I'm sorry, but they're my friends.

These women are just making this man up in their head of what they believe that they deserve, which they might.

Who am I?

Mel: That's a good term. What they deserve. That is, what am I.

Suzie: Who am I to say that they don't? But we are. We have just allowed ourselves to make this kind of dream person up in our heads of like, who he has to be and how much he has to make and how tall he has to be.

And he has to be fertile too, obviously. Like have the best children and have, you know, a great family and all of these things that make of a person that actually,

yeah, they might matter, but you cannot have a 10 out of 10 checklist.

Mel: Well, you're not a 10 out of 10. Probably.

Suzie: I would say nobody is a 10 out of 10. Nobody's a 10 out of 10. That's the problem.

Mel: The most attractive person in the world will have something about their personality. Whatever it is, it's totally ridiculous.

Suzie: Nobody's a 10 out of 10.

Mel: It's also not fair.

I mean, I think men do it about women and traditionally men did it about women too. And maybe now women think they're getting their own back, but they're not. They're just going to be alone.

Suzie: I think men are. I don't know what it is actually about the men who are thinking that they deserve a 10 out of 10. I actually believe that a lot of those men just want any attention from any kind of woman,

whether they are.

I hate saying like five, but, like, you know what I mean? Someone who's like, someone who's like mid attractive,

you know, has a good job, is a nice girl. Like,

I think those guys are actually don't care who they're getting the attention from. I think those men really just want attention from somebody. But those midwomen are looking for the attention from the top, the top of the chain.

And it's like, we don't all need that. We all should. Like, it's. Those may not even be the best men either. We've just made it up in our head.

Mel: They are not for you. And like, you know, be realistic.

Suzie: I think in my experience those like, top, top guys who are like the super hotties of the world who like make a lot of money,

I. In my experience, they actually cheat on their wives way more. They are actually not that nice of people.

And it's just like they're. They're not that great of partners.

The men who are really good partners are the ones who,

I don't know.

Mel: Like, that you wouldn't classify.

Suzie: You wouldn't classify as like a top, top man. But it doesn't even matter. Like, that shouldn't even matter. Like, those are the ones who are like you know, the five eights who have a great job, who work really hard, they want to take care of you, they care about your friends,

they care about your family, they care about their own family. Like they're charming, they're funny, they might not have a six pack and they, and they might not have a billion dollars,

but they're such good people.

But women have just made up this thing in their head and it's upsetting and it's sad and they don't want those mid men to approach them. Is a problem.

That's what we're saying.

Mel: Wow. Just encapsulated it. I, I, I, so I don't know that there's a.

Suzie: We're not, there's no solution. It's just keep on approaching.

Mel: There's no solution for this, for that and that. Sorry, you finished?

Suzie: No, I mean I, it's fine. I think it's just the men have to keep approaching. They have to keep flirting, they have to keep an open mind. Don't let ******* ruin your vibe.

Mel: That's exactly it. That's exactly what I was going to say is you should think about the rejection thing rather than.

My husband always says this when he was younger. It's like it's a numbers game, you know,

if they sort of knock me back, okay, well whatever and just move on.

Suzie: Exactly.

Mel: And I think you should think about it more like this. If a woman is bitchy to you or she does reject you, just go, well she wasn't the right person for me.

And just keep, move on. Just move along.

You know, because if she is going to talk to you,

if you're going to make the effort and like this guy says, use your flirting muscle, which I think is hilarious. And you're actually going to be a nice funny guy and you're going to say something like this guy takes some balls to come up to a girl and say that.

Suzie: It does.

Mel: Then you know what, if the woman is going to be a ***** or reject you, then you've got had a lucky escape quite frankly in your case. Okay. You know,

you were nice to him and just it wasn't, he wasn't your cup of tea and that's completely fine.

But that you should take that as actually a good thing. If she was bit, if she was bitchy. I found out now before I'm into the whole hornet's nest of bitchiness.

Suzie: Exactly.

Mel: I found out now and I can move along, move along.

Just move along.

And just, you know, if you are a guy like this and you are A nice guy and charming and you know how to read the room and you know how to kind of approach women in a non creepy,

nice, funny way, you know, like a charming way. You will be fine and you will meet, you will meet a great woman.

You will get knocked back because that's part of the process.

But take the knockbacks as that wasn't the woman.

Suzie: I also love what you just said like that a man who approaches a woman has balls. Like, absolutely. So luly. And a lot of women can see that and they appreciate that.

They're like, oh my God, he has confidence.

Mel: The right women.

Suzie: Yeah, well, exactly. But like,

like most women I think literally see that and they're like, this man has confidence.

This man is like approaching me. Appealing. It's already appealing. And if you actually don't feel like you know the situation or you need some help in this,

you have. There is a lot of men I know who have friends who are very good at approaching women.

Why don't you just, just watch, just sit back and watch what they do.

Ask your friends some questions as to how,

what the best way is to approach women. I believe it's literally just like be confident,

compliment and just no expectations.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: I mean in a public space where more people are.

Mel: Yeah. I mean, I do think it's however, to counter you.

Suzie: Okay.

Mel: Do you like me countering you? To counter you, I would say it's something you're kind of. You've got or you haven't got a muscle.

Suzie: It's a flirtat muscle, darling, so you gotta flex it.

Mel: I think some people just innately find it very easily and they're very good at it. Of course, if you don't, rather than kind of getting all in your head about it,

which seems to be what we're seeing online. A lot of men just really getting in their head about it. Just exercise your flirting muscle.

So maybe think about something or scenarios or whatever that you,

you can,

that you're comfortable in. So don't do stuff that you're not comfortable with.

And I think that's the same anything in life. Right.

Suzie: Counter that, go on them. And I'd say push yourself, push yourself out of the boundary and be like. And because it's not that scary, women.

Mel: What are they going to do to you?

Suzie: I mean, women are scary. I'm not, I'm actually, let me say this, women are pretty scary.

Mel: Nasty.

Suzie: Well, yeah, you know, we're scary. Like we can be scary and we can have these fudgeing, bitchy little faces on us. Us Especially pretty girls, like. And it is intimidating to come up to a group of women,

but that's hot.

And you have to get over that fear and you have to just allow yourself to be in the zone and just take a chance because you're never gonna be able to do it if you don't take.

Mel: That's a chance. And also, if you approach women and they. They are like, bitchy. Just. It's like learning. It's like anything in life, you're not gonna get it. Right? Like, you don't get on a bicycle and know how to ride the bicycle or whatever it is.

Right. You have to kind of practice.

Everyone gets attracted and why do you care?

Suzie: I got rejected. I got rejected last. Last week.

Mel: Did you?

Suzie: Yeah, from our. From Mr. Mr. What's his face.

Mel: You did. I know, but it was a nice rejection.

Suzie: Oh, it was a charming. Because I don't.

Mel: It was a charming rejection.

Suzie: With bad people.

Mel: It was a charming rejection.

Suzie: Look, everyone gets rejected.

Mel: It's okay. It's okay. Everyone, like, just. It is really fine. And just move along because that's not your person. Just move along and don't worry about it. Seriously.

Suzie: Kind of like puts you in your place. You're like, okay, gotta work on the next one.

Mel: Right?

Suzie: Get someone else the rost.

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: You know?

Mel: Yes.

Suzie: Keep building that roster, guys. Is that enough?

Mel: What?

Suzie: I hope it's enough for this commenter.

Mel: I think. I. I hope we. I would like him hopefully to come back when this video is live. Yes, darling. And tell us, please, can you tell us what. Whether we answer the question if there's anything missing.

Yeah.

Suzie: Because we did go on a bit of a rant, but we went on.

Mel: A bit of a rant, however, again, to end how we began. Well done.

Suzie: Well done.

Mel: I mean, you've done. I'm. I'm. It's amazing.

Suzie: Yeah. I'm so proud. I'm so happy that our listeners.

Mel: Proud of you.

Suzie: And we don't even know you, but we're proud of you.

Mel: So cool. And that women are reacting well to you because you've obviously figured it out and you're obviously figuring out to approach the right women in the right situations. And that's amazing.

Yeah.

Suzie: And if you guys. If you guys have anyone listening has any advice on this, if you guys have figured out how to approach women or anything like that, any tips for our other gentlemen listeners?

We'd love for you guys to DM us on Share My Truth Pod or you can also go to sharemytruth.com where you can email us or if you see this on YouTube,

then you can comment and we'd love, love, love to hear your thoughts on it.

Mel: Definitely. Okay.

Suzie: We love you guys so much and we'll chat with you later.

Mel: Until next time,

thanks so much for listening. Please rate and review this podcast and follow us on social at sharingmytruth Pod and leave us a voicemail on our website sharingmytruth.com to share your stories and experiences with us.

We'll see you next time.

Suzie: Bye Bye.

Mel: Three, two, one. Yeah.