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  • Chrissie

To trust or not to trust

Updated: Oct 5, 2023

Do you struggle with trust? Is decision making a nightmare and choices seem endless? Do you feel anxious about decisions or do you make decisions no matter the consequenses? What about intuition, do you go with it or ignore it? Have you considered why? We often know what is best for us and what we inately want, the flags and signals are there but we sometimes choose to ignore them. How do we know how to trust or not to trust?

to trust or not to trust

Life and Trauma

Life experiences and traumas can make it hard to make choices and believe in ourselves and put faith and trust in others. If people constantly let you down its hard to want to jump in and believe in someone. So how do you decide to trust or not to trust?

We often know what is best for us and what we inately want, the flags and signals are there but we sometimes choose to ignore them.

The choices we make

When we make choices, there are times the warnings are there, and we neglect them, especially in relationships when we ignore all the warnings. With very high divorce rates, one in every 309 Canadian adults is divorced according to an article in the Toronto Sun perhaps we are predisposed to not trust! We actually choose to go with what we want to see, not what is actually there.

Break the cycle

We talk ourselves into things to try and not be negative and then it goes wrong. So how to do you break this cycle?You have to start at the beginning and try and pick the right partner and many things in life stem from that. Don't ignore your gut, go with your instincts, it is often right.

What is trust based in?

I have always implicitely not blindly believed in my husband and he has always done the same for me. It has never crossed either of our minds to not do so.

I was thinking about this recently as a friend of mine asked me, "as your husband travels so much do you trust him?"I was if I am honest slightly taken aback by the question. After it sank in I considered what that meant and why it shocked me.

To trust or not to trust?

I have been married for more than 21 years. I didn't think that would be me. My parents seperated when I was young and tore each apart financially and emotionally for almost 10 years and finally divorced when I was 21. I didn't think I was destined to marry young and to marry a man who would support and stand by me and me him no matter what, through the ups and downs and the twists and turns of life. That is why I trust my husband. I have never ever doubted it, I don't need to. Some may think that is naive but I have never had to doubt that decision.

What is the bedrock?

Trust is curcial in a relationship. It is the bedrock. If you have to question it in my opinion there is a problem. It is, that is for sure, but to succeed and to build a strong relationship filled with love, you have to have faith. When you find the person that cares for you, supports you, loves you, hold and tight and don't let them go. Life can be very dark and trying at times but with a supportive partner you can handle almost anything that is thrown at you.

That is how to trust or not to trust.

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