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Episode 55  -  Truth Sharing: My Boyfriend is Bisexual, I Need Some Advice!
Melany Krangle & Suzie Sheckter

Suzie: Got to make you british yet. Actually, no. You're gonna have to speak with a London accent. How are you gonna do that? Oh, ****.

Mel: May work.

Suzie: No, you're gonna have to practice. Got a long way to go, love. Yikes. Gotta learn the lingo.

Mel: Tell me your favorite lingo right now.

Suzie: My favorite lingo? Yeah.

Mel: Tell me a good ******* word that I should know.

Suzie: I just said it to you. Bishbos. Bishbos. Oh, I love a bishbos. Get it done. No, it means bishbos. Get it done, mate.

Mel: Does anyone know what she just said?

Suzie: Bishbos. Bishbos. Bishbos. Get it done. 1234.

Mel: Welcome to sharing my truth with Melan Suzie. The uncensored version where we bear it all.

Suzie: We do.

Mel: Hello. Hello and welcome back. Did you like that?

Suzie: No.

Mel: Well, welcome back. Share Richard. Pod, you're here with Mel and Suzie. We're happy to be here. We hope you are too. And here's a quick little friendly reminder to her. Subscribe. Give this pod. You see that little thing in the corner of your phone? Just hit that little bell. Subscribe, shoot us a message, and find us on all the socials. Sharingmytruthpod. We want to connect with you. Give us a little five star review if you have a second. We really appreciate it, and we love you so much. Hey, babes.

Suzie: Hello, darling.

Mel: How are you?

Suzie: I'm just great.

Mel: Yeah, you're fab. You're always fab.

Suzie: I'm always. I mean, you know, I have my moments of not being fab, obviously of not of. But no, I'm pretty fab.

Mel: Okay, good. I know Mel is always on the go.

Suzie: Okay.

Mel: You think Mel?

Suzie: That's why I don't, like, know. I know.

Mel: We were just talking about meditating and breathing, and Mel has never had taken a deep breath in her entire ******* life. She doesn't have time for this bullshit.

Suzie: Time to breathe. No, I'm not really into.

Mel: What I.

Suzie: You know what I do, like, what makes me relax is I'm a bit of a. This is a new word for me. A content *****.

Mel: Oh, you are a content.

Suzie: Total content *****.

Mel: That doesn't mean that's relaxing.

Suzie: Oh, it is for me.

Mel: Oh.

Suzie: Because I watch all sorts of stuff and, like, find it very relaxing to escape. Okay, but I'm a total content horse.

Mel: You're an escaper. Reality tv.

Suzie: No, I hate it. Things I hate.

Mel: I tried to get Mel on to it. Just came out on Netflix. Millionaire matchmaker. It's like old, old, old show from the. It's the funniest thing for me because I used to watch it when I was like 13 years old or something. And I'm watching it now, and they're so mean to these women. It's kind of funny to watch, though.

Suzie: I might watch though, because I did watch indian matchmaker and the jewish matchmaker, which was just hilarious.

Mel: So bad.

Suzie: It's terrible tv. And my husband was just like, what?

Mel: I love it though, the matchmaking stuff. It is so funny to me. I'm like, imagine your parents getting this involved in what is going on in your love life.

Suzie: Terrifying.

Mel: It's crazy, but it's the things they.

Suzie: Want find so peculiar. Like, this is like, no, you're so focused on these nano micro things that are not important.

Mel: I also feel like I would have been, in another life, a great matchmaker.

Suzie: Yeah, I can see that.

Mel: I think I actually would have crushed the match of yankee business.

Suzie: Crushed? Yeah, crushed. Crushed out of it.

Mel: Just like. Absolutely. Like men, women. Who do you like? What do you do?

Suzie: Yeah, I think you would have been very good at that.

Mel: I could still do it.

Suzie: Yeah, you could, because I think they're ****. So there's room for you because these.

Mel: Were like bars on the floor.

Suzie: The bars below the floor. I mean, the things you're like, this is who you came up with? How much you paying this woman?

Mel: I know. It's actually really funny. You're like, how are there not more people who want to? I don't know. Maybe not anyway. But yeah, we have a little write in today, which was very fun. We always get people messaging us, commenting and dming us, emailing us, sending in their voicemails, which we absolutely love to hear from you guys. You guys can also do that. and so someone wrote into us, and it's kind of about dating. It's kind of about love life. And Mel, I want you to read it.

Suzie: I thought it was very interesting.

Mel: It's very interesting because it's not the.

Suzie: Angle you normally think.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: So this listener has written into us and said that the man that she's been seeing for over a year is bisexual and has slept with men in the past. And when he told her that at the start, she pretended it was okay.

Mel: Okay.

Suzie: So she went, oh, yeah, that's fine. But she really wasn't okay. And she also says it's the first bisexual person she's ever met. I don't know whether she means man, because I think in a lot of people's minds, a bisexual man is. And it is technically statistically rarer than a bisexual woman.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: And I think we have a lot of hang ups about it, which is for the rest of the pod. But anyway, and now she's worried, like, I guess it's come back to her frontal conscious or whatever, that she keeps worrying that he's going to sleep with a man and he's going to go off because he's bisexual, he's going to need it. And that is not something she's into. She's not into that or him being unfaithful.

Mel: So she's like, what should we do?

Suzie: What do I do?

Mel: Well, as a little bisexual woman.

Suzie: Exactly.

Mel: Obviously I can't speak for the bisexual men because I'm sure it's weird because they have a lot more sexy hormones. I feel like going on in the *****.

Suzie: Sexy hormones. Yeah, going on in the *****.

Mel: As we've talked about before, Mel, you got to just get it out, right? Men just have to get it out. Women are a bit more different.

Suzie: In that case.

Mel: I personally, as a biwoman, I still do. Being in a relationship, I still am very attracted to women and I still would love to have not relationships with women being in already relationships, but I'd still like to hook up with women, which I have before. Yes, openly in my relationship. But it is a lot more difficult, I think, for a guy who's a bisexual guy who's in a relationship with a straight woman. Because to have maybe that extra sexual relationship on the side is a little bit dirtier. And maybe that's so rude of me to say, but it does make you like men are just different than women and women keep it tight.

Suzie: Do men going into a hole? That is the big difference, susie, let's not sugarcoat it. There is a ***** going into a hole that has poo in it. I'm not glotting over the facts here.

Mel: Definitely not.

Suzie: But I mean, that's true, isn't it?

Mel: No, you're 100%.

Suzie: I mean, it might be going into her hole, but then it would be her poo. So that's different.

Mel: Yeah, it's a little different.

Suzie: Back hole.

Mel: Well, it's a relationship hole. It's not like a hookup hole.

Suzie: Exactly.

Mel: Hookup holes. You don't know where those holes have been.

Suzie: Exactly. Or if they're clean, they've been washed out.

Mel: You don't know.

Suzie: Going into a lot of detail. But these are the facts, the reality.

Mel: These are the facts.

Suzie: I think this is multipronged. It is. So I think the first thing is kind of social stigma, social prejudice that we are much more set up to being acceptable for whatever reason, which is a kind of complex thing for bisexual women to have, like you to be in a relationship with a man and to have kind of things or not things with women, to either have had a relationship with a woman, to have hookups or whatever you want to call it, during or whatever. I think that is definitely a thing. I think statistically, if I'm not wrong, there are more bisexual women than men as well. So I think. I think that is a fact.

Mel: Big thing. Because it's also like being open, being an open bisexual man, there's going to be less men that are like 100% being like, yes, I'm a bisexual. It's like, no, I don't think so. I just like to watch gay ****. It's fine.

Suzie: I think it's because if you're a bisexual woman like yourself, yes. Most women are not going to go.

Mel: They're just going to know.

Suzie: Okay.

Mel: And I think a lot you do you. Yeah, and whatever. When you're a bisexual woman, you kind of just usually you're accepting more of it. Like you don't care as much what other people think of you because you're like, well, it's just the way I am. But men have this thing because they have a stigma on themselves, which you've talked to about, like societal stigma. Women don't have that as much.

Suzie: Yeah, well, I think, look, let's be honest, men still have masses of hang ups about homosexuality, be they young or old, which is shocking to women because women don't have those hang ups. But I find young men and older men of my age and older, obviously, they all have hang ups about homosexuality. And so if you have a group of guy friends who are all straight and then you sort of suddenly admit and be different if they kind of knew it at the beginning, you can't sort of suddenly go, oh, yeah, by the way, I'm bisexual. You'll freak them all out because they all stupidly think that you want to sleep with them, which is reality, which is absurd. Yeah. Whereas women don't think that. And I think there is also a reality that, let's face it, the idea of a bisexual woman, and this is, again, hugely prejudiced, loaded, whatever you want to call it, is appealing to men and to women, whatever, whether they're straight or not. They don't recoil at it. Right. There's so many issues there, but I think that's just a fact. It's sexier, nicer, whatever. And I think that if you are in a relationship with a bisexual man, I guess your presumption is because he's a man, he needs lots of sex, and if he's bisexual, he's going to go off again. I don't know. That's not fair. I was listening to something the other day and it was actually about this question of bisexuality that just because you're bisexual, it doesn't mean if you're in a relationship that you obviously have to do both of the things at once. It's really dependent on the relationship. And if you are bisexual but you're having a relationship with the opposite sex at that time, maybe at that time, that's all it is.

Mel: It's like the same thing as to whether you're kind of a promiscuous person that's going to sleep with a lot of people anyways. It's like, okay, well, if you're not that type of person, you're not going to sleep with a bunch of people anyways.

Suzie: Do you know what I mean?

Mel: Yeah, it's okay if you're a bisexual woman. You're not just going to sleep with a bunch of women if that's not really like you're happy to be in your relationship kind of thing. Exactly.

Suzie: It's just a stupid thing that we think. Exactly that. That if you're in a relationship with somebody and let's say you're straight and you have had a past where you had lots of partners, why do you assume if you found somebody you're very connected to that you're going to go off and sleep with lots of people? It's the same thing. And it's a prejudice. It's a preconceived idea that we have because we don't know what we're talking about. In this woman's case, there is no answer, really.

Mel: I mean, it's hard because she said that she was okay with it, right. First, which is like, I think everyone, a lot, most of us do this when we're starting a relationship. We get thrown off by things like, oh, yeah, I have this baggage, whatever it might be or not baggage, but for us, we think it's baggage kind of thing. It's new to us and we're like, oh, yeah, that's fine, that'll be fine. And then it becomes more of something you're thinking about during their actual relationship. You get heavier into your relationship and you're like, oh my God, I actually am not okay with this. And I think that's okay to bring up too, if it's actually your partner, if you actually want this to work, you should actually be able to be able to talk about something like this.

Suzie: Yeah, I think I was just actually checking if the listener had said what their age was because I think that obviously the younger you are, the less baggage you have. So it's not going to be lots and lots of baggage and going to be really bad. The older you get, the more you're dating. Like, everyone's got baggage. So, I mean, if you meet somebody and already you eliminate so many people, so then you eventually get somebody you actually wouldn't mind going out for a drink with or dinner or sleep with, that's like eliminated a lot of people already. If you then eliminate all the things that you think you don't really like, I think that's what goes through people's minds. If you go, well, I don't like the fact he has kids or I don't like the fact that he lives there. So I think he said that he's bisexual. She probably obviously genuinely liked him, was attracted to him, and just thought, okay, I'll just kind of deal with this in another time. And then you start getting more into it and then it's like, okay, now what does that actually mean? And to be fair to her, she's been honest and said, I don't know anything about this. I'm not familiar with what that really means. I've not surrounded myself with people who are bisexual or met people. So what does that actually mean? And you can answer the question better than me, obviously, but I personally think it's dependent on the person. You can't say bisexual people are like this. That's like ridiculous. No.

Mel: Yeah, because obviously it's the most ridiculous thing. If someone's going to sleep with someone else, if you're going to cheat in a relationship, that's a personal thing. It's not like a bisexual.

Suzie: Of course not. Do that anyway.

Mel: You're going to do it anyways. It's just a weird personality thing. But yeah, so if you don't actually talk to that person about their sexuality, which is a huge thing in a relationship, you have to be like, hey, do you still find this woman? Because she doesn't really know anything about male bisexuality. She should be asking her partner, being like, do you still find men attractive? What's your type with a man? You should want to be kind of interested in that kind of thing. It's the same thing with asking what people like in the bedroom. You should want to know as much as you can about this person anyways, so they shouldn't be offended by your questions.

Suzie: No, they shouldn't. I mean, he's told you, as long.

Mel: As you're not being mean about it, being like, I'm not okay with you being bisexual. And if that's the case, then you shouldn't be in this relationship.

Suzie: I 100% agree. I mean, we live in a world where we're sort of so scared to say anything or talk about what we like and don't like because it gets all very blurred and people offended about absolutely everything. Oh my God, is that. Yes. If you don't like the idea, and this is not good for you, that he is bisexual, you do need to talk to him. And if it is insurmountable, then it is insurmountable and that's the end of it. But I mean, I think you really like, I'm going to say the same thing again. You need to communicate with him, you need to talk to him and you need to see what it actually means. Is it that he, because from my understanding of bisexuality, I'm trying to sound very scholarly, is that it does very much depend whether this is a lifestyle choice or this is an experience led choice, I. E. You've had experiences in the past and yes, you enjoy them, but they're sort of experience that stay in those situations and you're not terribly interested in bringing it into your actual mainstream everyday life. And there are different people who live in different ways. And that's quite possible that he was telling her about his experiences, but now he's not interested in that. Or maybe is, I don't know. But they've got to be honest with each other. And if they can't find a way of living through this or with this or whatever, I mean, being afraid of somebody going off and going off with somebody else has got nothing to do with your sexuality. I know plenty of people who are afraid of that and it's going off of the opposite.

Mel: It's a bit of an insecure thing too, on her part.

Suzie: You need to understand why and yeah, you need to talk to them. But I do think the bisexuality in men is very, seen very, very differently. And I think we have many hang ups, men and women, about it. And I think there are plenty of men who've had experiences with men. I think of the men that I certainly think that I've friends with or talked to or whatever. A lot of my female friends have had some kind of experience with a woman, especially at universities. Very common. Right. I can't think.

Mel: Experiment a little bit.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: Except for you, Mel.

Suzie: Except for me. I equally have lots of friends who haven't. But I'm just saying, I'd say there's a bigger proportion of women. The men, I don't know any, but they could be lying and they probably are lying. But I do feel possibly there's more women. But maybe it's easier. Maybe there's less.

Mel: There's less stigma.

Suzie: Stigma. It's easy to do it. It's easier to do it literally. And I do think there is a thing about. It's more invasive. Yeah.

Mel: Because if you're like, at a college party, let's say, or a high school party, whatever, and you see two girls making out, you're like, oh, my God, that's so hot. But if you see two guys making out and they're actually straight, you're like, what's going on?

Suzie: Exactly.

Mel: There's a completely different thought exactly about it.

Suzie: Exactly.

Mel: And if you're a woman, if you're, like, in a relationship and you're the straight woman and you see that your male partner is watching, like, gay ****, you're also going to question that 100%.

Suzie: You're going to be like, but not the woman watching.

Mel: No, exactly.

Suzie: No, you wouldn't question it. And it's funny, like, I can remember years ago, my husband was at. It was actually a Christmas party, and he worked for this big corporation, so it was very corporate and whatever. And it was in England, so in the old days, people, well, they still get drunk. I don't know if they get drunk in. They're worried about what they're going to do in corporate situations. But everyone got absolutely slammed. And Christmas parties in England are notorious for this. Anyway, it's in this place, in this sort of know, they'd had dinner and then they're dancing or whatever they're doing, and they're all standing around, had way too much to drink. And then all of a sudden, towards the end of the evening, two, I think they were actually two of the secretaries is so cliched.

Mel: Oh, my God.

Suzie: Just absolutely hammered. And happened to be one was very attractive, one, not so much. Just started going for it.

Mel: Oh, my God.

Suzie: And having this big old snog sesh.

Mel: In front of everyone, in front of.

Suzie: Every CEO, the board members, like every director. And this is very male led industry, so mostly all the management, not all, but male dominated. And of course, they thought this was fantastic.

Mel: I hope these ladies got promotions after.

Suzie: Right, exactly. And they were just everyone just couldn't believe it. Oh, my God. But can you imagine if two of the male directors had suddenly got shitfaced and suddenly gone for it? I don't think there would be the same reaction. No. And I know this happened. I'd say this happened about probably 15 years ago. I still don't think. I still think it would not be.

Mel: Like with a little mailroom boys or something. Everyone just be like, no, isn't he married?

Suzie: It would be completely different. And that is something in us that's a hang up that, I don't know. We see women.

Mel: Something has to do with up the bums thing.

Suzie: Definitely it has to do with it.

Mel: Not that it's saying that's all of what it is, but, yeah, there's a lot of things that we don't really understand. Because I'm a fan of ****, I'll say that, but I'm not. What's not to like?

Suzie: Straight people and gay people. A lot of people are, but it's different. If you're using, like I said to you earlier, a stick rather than a ****, you can clean that stick off.

Mel: You can.

Suzie: The ****. It's questionable.

Mel: It's questionable.

Suzie: And I would like to caveat this now by saying, please do all the preparation.

Mel: Wrap up your willie. Wrap up your willie.

Suzie: You can prepare the old hole, get it all cleaned out. It doesn't need to be pooey.

Mel: No, it doesn't need to be.

Suzie: Maybe your thing, but it's not cool.

Mel: Just make sure you're prepared.

Suzie: If we're going to do this, just prepare. I know that's not always what happens in life, because things just happen.

Mel: Yeah, they do.

Suzie: But anyway.

Mel: Absolutely. The woman who's written into us, definitely be open with your partner.

Suzie: Yes.

Mel: Make sure that you communicate not. You're like, I'm so worried that you're going to hook up with another man, but it's like, just ask him quite more questions about it. I just don't think you know enough about this with your specific person.

Suzie: I think you can ask, like, just start the conversation, basically, start the open, the communication about it. Start asking some questions and then just. You can keep going with those questions. Yeah, I think it's perfectly acceptable. If he's told you he's bisexual, he might even be waiting for you to ask.

Mel: No, that's the thing I was going to say. It's like literally bisexual people. I will speak for all of us when we say we want you to talk to us about it.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: We love to talk about this ****.

Suzie: Right.

Mel: So, I mean, it is interesting. Like, he's brought it up.

Suzie: He's been open with you about it.

Mel: Yeah, absolutely. Ask those questions. He might really want to talk to you about it and he doesn't want to bring it up again, 100%. He might want to hurt your feelings.

Suzie: Well, he might be waiting for you to ask.

Mel: Yeah.

Suzie: He's not a mind reader. He doesn't know how you feel about it. And you need to find out what his. Because when you met, he would have told you that. But obviously maybe he didn't go into a lot of detail. And now you just kind of sounds like just been together for a bit and enjoying each other's company and various other things. And now you're getting to another stage. And so now you really need to be asking those questions and you need to know whether this is something he's going to need to do if this is the part of his lifestyle that he. I think you've said this before. I think the term is nesting. Like, you nest with one sex, but perhaps like the opposite sex, and that's always what you do. But you are bisexual. Is that the best way of putting it?

Mel: Well, yeah, you have your preferences. It's like sexuality is a scale. You're not going to be completely bi. Maybe not. Right? Like you might be more leaning towards the other way. And you just got to ask him.

Suzie: And it could change. It could eb and flow. And maybe in his case it's changed. Maybe he's only interested in her. I mean, who knows? But the only way you're going to find out is to talk to him. And I would say, this is not my field of expertise, but I would say in anything to do with anybody's intimate or personal life, you have to communicate. But start gently, be kind, just start the conversation. Don't be critical. Sound like interested. I'd like to know a little bit about your past, your history. Just be interested.

Mel: And you might have to do a little **** if he wants that.

Suzie: And maybe that could be your thing. Maybe that could be your thing. And you could have dicks and sticks.

Mel: Oh, dicks and sticks.

Suzie: You like that?

Mel: That's going to be our band name. Not the Dixie chicks. The Dixie sticks.

Suzie: They're not called the Dixie chicks anymore. They're just the chicks. Because Dixie is not cool. Because it's. Anyway, I'm going off on a tangent.

Mel: I didn't know that. We'll have to look it up after this. Okay, well, I hope that helps our little friend.

Suzie: Yes.

Mel: And if anyone else is listening and they have a story like this, they are by and they want to come into the conversation. Or maybe your partner's buy or you just have a question about it, write into us. Go to, find us on social, sharemytooth pod. Send us a little DM. Send us a little voicemail. Send us an email. We want to hear about it.

Suzie: We do. And on that note. Yeah. Last week, yes. Our episode was age gappers.

Mel: Age gappers.

Suzie: Which a lot of people have said to me since, I just love that. And I said, I wish I had invented that. But I didn't. Yeah, it is hilarious. I mean, it sounds a bit. It's not terribly sexy, I don't think.

Mel: Age gap.

Suzie: No, it sounds sort of a bit rudimentary. But on that note, we did get quite a few comments about people in their own situations. So one person. This is actually a little depressing.

Mel: No, it's fine.

Suzie: Listener who said. Who wrote in and said that they've been married for 30 years, which is a long time.

Mel: That's a long.

Suzie: Longer than me.

Mel: Oh, my.

Suzie: Can you imagine? What? Jesus. Yeah. And so she's a. She's 58 and the husband is 72. And that when they first started going out, which I think is actually very.

Mel: Common insurance, that's like.

Suzie: That's a lot.

Mel: Almost like. That's like 15 years or something like that.

Suzie: Something like that.

Mel: We're not good at math, so don't ask.

Suzie: We're terrible at math.

Mel: Okay, sorry, go ahead.

Suzie: It's a lot.

Mel: It's a lot.

Suzie: And that at the beginning, it wasn't an issue. And I think in a lot of couples cases, that's the way it starts. You're in love and they said 30 years, so he would have been 42. Is that good?

Mel: That's great. Yeah. Not that I would know.

Suzie: That's the right math. Yeah. 42. Okay. Three and four, seven. Love it. So he would have been very youthful. And she would obviously have been even younger. Yeah. Anyway, she would have been. Oh, crikey. She would have. Hang on. God, I cannot. My maths. Absolutely.

Mel: The maths are not mathing today. The girl maths, she was 28 and he was 42.

Suzie: And he was 42.

Mel: That's me going out with a 42.

Suzie: Year old, which is nothing. It's a lot of difference.

Mel: That's different.

Suzie: That's 14 years.

Mel: I'm not against that. Don't get me wrong. I would.

Suzie: No. But a man at 42 is going to look good. Yeah. He's in his prime.

Mel: Absolutely.

Suzie: A woman's obviously going to look fantastic. I think if you meet somebody, obviously you're attracted at 42 is very young. I mean, I'm 50 and I know a joke. I say, I'm old, I'm 51. What am I saying? I've minused a year. I'm going backwards and I don't feel old.

Mel: No, you look incredible. Thank you.

Suzie: But you wouldn't meet somebody and go, oh, my God, you're too old. If you were attracted at the beginning. And now he's 72. That's a long ****** time. So what else is she saying? So what she's saying is that now she's 58. Let me go back to my little massage. She's 58, so she's seven years older than me. So she's in a totally different part of her life. She said she's still working, she's got friends, and she still wants to be in that vibe. Whereas he's like, I want to retire and go and live in Florida, probably, or whatever. And there are lots of nice places in Florida.

Mel: I'm not yet doubting that.

Suzie: He'S in a different space in a different place. Right. I mean, it sounds like at 72, you're also quite young. Sounds like he's a bit an old 72. But what I think is even sadder is she said she doesn't want to be with him anymore. Oh, my God. But she feels too guilty to leave. I would say this, and this is somebody who sent this in. They didn't sort of say, I need advice or whatever. They were just commenting on the episode and sending their situation in. I think there's something deeper going on. It's like if he's at a different stage in his life and you still love him, then you'll find a way. This sounds, if you actually want to leave him, it's more than just you're at different places.

Mel: Well, I mean, this is just me because this is where my mind goes automatically, is that they're probably not having sex anymore. It's probably harder for him to get it up than it used to be.

Suzie: There's all sorts of medication for that, too.

Mel: I know, but if maybe he's not interested in it. Right. Because guts go through that, too, where they actually, just, like, their hormones are in a weird place and then they don't actually want to have sex. But she's in a place where we know.

Suzie: Yeah, women, you want the complete, actually opposite.

Mel: Exactly.

Suzie: I mean, it depends on the woman. But your hormone is going to actually send you into a sort of thing, a bit like when you're pregnant, this weird thing that it's just all a bit. You want to **** very good. Yes. And you can be very good at it.

Mel: Yes, absolutely.

Suzie: And he might be in a stage in his life. Yeah. Where he just. His libido is low, blah, blah, blah. I mean, we don't know, because she didn't say no, we don't know. But I think there's a lot more going on. Like, 72 is obviously not 58, but there's a lot of very good looking 72 year old men who are very youthful and want to go out and have fun. And obviously, she's at a point where she enjoys her social circle. She likes going out. And he wants to kind of go and sit down, have a cup of tea, and I get it. I get that.

Mel: I just feel like at that age, if you want to leave your partner that you've been with for 30 years, can you imagine that means that you want to **** other people? Do you know what I mean? Because there's not really. Because you're happy together in the sense of like, yeah, maybe you have different lives, but it sounds like they've had different kind of lives because they have so much of an age difference that they're used to that. So I think this is more sexual. This is me making assumption. Obviously, she's not saying this. No, she is, but this is my assumption of, like, this is a sexual thing. And maybe this is not me giving her advice. She didn't ask for my advice.

Suzie: But you're going to give it anyway.

Mel: I'm going to give it anyways, maybe. What if they open up their relationship?

Suzie: You just had to, didn't you?

Mel: I don't see the problem. He doesn't want to ****. She wants to ****.

Suzie: You just can't help yourself. Well, I think they need to have a chat about that. I agree, but it sounds to me, obviously, this is not some long essay she sent us, so we don't know and we're reading between the lines. But if you are already decided, I want to leave him. Yeah. It sounds to me like you've gone through all these combinations. I know you're in a different part of the road and maybe he's not aware of where you are. Well, good luck with that. And somebody else sent us in. It was just a message to say they listened to our episode and they said. Made a comment that I thought was a good comment. And they said that one of the things about age gap relationships, where the age gap is 2025 years like a large age gap, that there's something else about it. If you get on, which we talked about, like, you just click, you connect. But also, a younger person can gain a lot from being with an older person, like in wisdom and their perspective on the world, and they've lived through so much. So it's very kind of like you learn a lot, right.

Mel: And from each other, not from the older person.

Suzie: And the older person enjoys being with the younger person because it makes them feel youthful and it sort of invigorates them in that way. And so that I can see how that also is another added thing. Why if you've met the right person and you click that, that is another really interesting dimension to your relationship. Like, you as the younger person, benefit from the wisdom of the older person and their perspective, which is going to be different because most of us, like you and I, you're going to have to get to my age. God help you to actually be able to see things the way I see it. Because at the older you get, you see things differently.

Mel: Totally.

Suzie: Because you've lived through all this stuff. Absolutely. But when you're older, to be around young people like you and me is invigorating.

Mel: You invigorate me still, though, Mel.

Suzie: You do. Wow.

Mel: Yeah, you're my young little lady. Yeah, you're my young little lady friend.

Suzie: My lady friend. I love it. Anyway, those are the comments from the. So go back and listen.

Mel: Yeah, if you haven't aged to go back and listen to it because I thought it was pretty good. A lot of people are dealing with this right now because a lot of people are getting divorced and they also take a look at their life and they're like, what kind of a person do I want to be with? I want to be with a younger person. Or the young people want to be with those older people who can provide a little bit more than who is in their age dating pool. So there's a lot of reasons why people do it.

Suzie: Yeah, I think there's a lot. I think there's also people find dating is very hard.

Mel: Oh, my God, it's the worst.

Suzie: And I was reading something actually today about how in 2024, apparently people have decided they want to get off the apps and into the real world.

Mel: Good.

Suzie: Which is called something. There's a term which I've forgotten, but I think there's also that, that you go into the real world and if you eliminate, like we were just talking about, say, well, I'm not going out with you because you're too old, not going out with you because you're too this not going, then what are you left with?

Mel: Exactly.

Suzie: So what if you do meet somebody that is amazing that you connect with, have a great time. The only thing is the age difference. What are you going to do, toss that? Yeah. And also there's this thing of people look younger. Yeah.

Mel: People looking great. You see Jlo, you see Jen Aniston. I know George Clooney, all these older people, not that they're old, but like, you know, but it's different. 20 anymore.

Suzie: Yeah, we talked about this and then I found a post and I actually posted this the other day on our social, which was a picture of the character in the golden girls called Blanche. Do you remember that character?

Mel: Oh, my God, so funny.

Suzie: Who's like the saucy, sexy sort of vixer. And I think she was meant to be in her 50s or 60s. Anyway, the post was, this is her at 50 and she's got that sort of short makingly hair and the sort of very midwestern sort of clothes. And then there's JLo, exactly the same picture. Cleavage out, amazing mid drift looking million dollars. And so that our perception today of somebody in their 50s versus the Gong girls was when I was young. So, I mean, gong girls in the 80s. Yeah, I think I was a child. But it's funny though, isn't it? It is. And even people in their 70s like shows like the golden. Is it the Golden Bachelor?

Mel: Oh my God, that is so funny.

Suzie: I just see the. I watched one episode.

Mel: It was hilarious, though.

Suzie: I did see a little bit about.

Mel: These women are so funny. If you guys.

Suzie: I haven't seen it.

Mel: The funniest thing. And it's just like so wholesome. Like these people are just like, they're in a new age, in a new part of their life and they just.

Suzie: Still want to **** and they still.

Mel: Want to find love. And these women are so confident in their age and their bodies and they don't give a **** and it's so awesome.

Suzie: But they were like in their 70s, right?

Mel: Yeah, I think it was like 50 and up or something like that.

Suzie: So it's just a whole different thing.

Mel: Yeah, it's so great. Anyways, if you have any comments or questions, make sure to give us a little dm. Get us a little email, send us a little voicemail. We'd love to hear from you guys.

Suzie: And I've got something to add.

Mel: Oh, please.

Suzie: Nothing to do with this episode at all, but it's been bothering me.

Mel: Oh, go ahead.

Suzie: So I've seen it on social or everywhere. Is this bathtub episode in Saltburn?

Mel: Oh, my God. I haven't seen it yet.

Suzie: What the hell happens in the bathtub?

Mel: No, we're going to go watch it after that.

Suzie: Got to watch it.

Mel: We're going to go watch it after this.

Suzie: Everywhere. It's like a thing on TikTok and Instagram. Everywhere. Like they get their parents or older relatives to watch the scene. And Rosalind Pikes did it. Who's hilarious. Who does that famous line, I've slept with the lesbians. It's all a bit wet and I moved on to men kind of thing. And so I don't know what it's about, but there's a scene in a bathtub and everyone who watches. Is there a ***** going into something?

Mel: Yeah, no, I think we get to see a *****.

Suzie: I think that's why. Is that it?

Mel: Is that it?

Suzie: Because you see all these people and they just like, they're like horrified shelter. I thought somebody pooed in the bath or something.

Mel: I was like, if it's just a *****, who cares? No, we're going to go watch it after.

Suzie: I've got to, but somebody's got to tell me because I'm just.

Mel: No, we're going to bothering me.

Suzie: I've got to go watch the ****** thing.

Mel: Yeah, we're going to watch it.

Suzie: But then I just going to have to fast forward because I just want a ****** nose. I get it. Anyway, that's it. That's all.

Mel: I love that, though. If you guys have seen that episode, let us know what you guys think.

Suzie: Is this old burn a movie or is it a show? It's a movie, right?

Mel: We're going to watch it.

Suzie: Yeah. Anyway, that's all I have to say about that.

Mel: Make sure to get in the bathroom, get a little squeak on.

Suzie: Get a squeaky clean. A what?

Mel: A squeak on.

Suzie: What the hell does that mean?

Mel: Get yourself a little squeaky clean up in your butt.

Suzie: Right. Okay. There we go.

Mel: And we'll see you next time. On that note, bye. Love you. Sharingmytruthpod is so excited to partner with, where the a in vibrator is the number eight. This is an extremely exclusive code where no other podcast has it. If you go to right now, use the code MS 15. That's MS 15 at You can now get 15% off anything in store that's any sex toys for you, your partner, your neighbor, your mom. We don't judge. We don't care.

Suzie: Get it now.

Mel: Go to the link in our bio, put in the code, and get jiggy with it.

Suzie: Thanks so much for listening. Please rate and review this podcast and follow us on social at sharingmytruthpod and leave us a voicemail on our, to share your stories and experiences with us. We'll see you next time.

Mel: Bye bye.

Suzie: Three, two, one. Yeah, don't sa.

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